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There may be spelling / grammar mistakes in my articles that make it through my editing, and that’s on purpose. I’m a recovering perfectionist (who was once VERY hard on himself) and one of the ways I’m learning to be compassionate on myself is by allowing mistakes to just … be.
Friends.
I started working for Apple, Inc. in 2010 and worked there until 2021 - 11 years.
I started as a part-time specialist.
Went on to full-time.
Then was promoted to a Sales Expert.
And (later) a Business Expert.
In that time I worked at 4 different stores in 2 different states - New Jersey and North Carolina. Shifts were 9 hours (and usually 11-12 hours during holiday season and product launches) and I spent 90% of the day on my feet selling phones, tablets, computers, etc. and helping (literally) hundreds of customers a week.
Then in 2020 COVID hit and all the stores shut down.
For a while we didn’t do much from home - we had daily check-ins where the entire store team would join a call, we had weekly connections with our managers, etc. And even though we were doing substantially LESS work (not much, really), we continued to get paid our normal rate for our full 40 hours/week.
Apple really did treat us well in what proved to be a very trying time.
And then a couple of weeks into the pandemic I was told that a computer would be mailed to me so that I could work from home. For how long? No one really knew at the time, but since I was on the “business team” and spent the majority of my day at a desk in the back of the store, I was told I’d likely be home for a while because when the stores did open back up they’d only be allowed to have a certain amount of people in the building at once.
Working from home “for a while” turned into workin from home for over a year - the store closed in March 2020 and I didn’t step foot in a store until the following Summer.
And.
Honestly?
It was awesome. Not only were my “numbers” (for sales and things) HIGHER and BETTER than they were when I was working in store, but …
Man.
… I was SO. MUCH. happier. Like, my mental health was 10,000x better. Why? Not because I didn’t enjoy being in the store or with my coworkers or helping customers face-to-face, but because I was HOME with my family.
Yes:
Home.
With.
My.
Family.
And this was a REVOLUTIONARY thing for me because the store, you see, was about 45 minutes from home and my shifts were usually right around rush hour (to and from work) which made my 45 minute commute a 90 minute (+) commute.
To spell it out for you - my shifts were usually 9-6 and so I would leave home at 7-7:30 when Jordan was waking up and get home 7:30-8 when Jordan was going to bed.
AND.
On top of THAT.
I was wrapping up my Doctoral Degree and working on the podcast and so I’d walk in the door after an incredibly long day, help get Jordan to bed, eat dinner, talk to Dana for a bit, and then work from 9:30 until I couldn’t keep my eyes open and then go to bed to get up and do it all again the next day.
Oh.
And on my breaks at work? I was usually either reading and preparing interviews for the podcast or working on my disseration or some sort of paper for school.
And this? I did this for the first 3 years of Jordan’s life - I rarely saw her when I had to work and saw most of her big moments on recorded video (or live via FaceTime if I was lucky enough to be on a break when she was playing with a friend or taking her first steps).
Sigh.
But when the pandemic hit? It was a horrible time, for sure, but it was good for me in a way because I got to be home …
I could play with Jordan on my breaks,
She could sit on my lap while I worked.
I could see her on her swingset right outside the window in my office.
I was home for dinner every night, part of bedtime and playdates and so many other things that I had missed.
Yeah - I was in heaven.
But then Apple told me that it was time to come back to the store. I knew it was coming and so I had spent about 6 months prior to the announcement trying to land a permanent “at-home” role with AppleCare or Online Sales or something (anything!); but even after working there for 11 years and applying for 30+ roles that I was more than qualified for … not one single person called me back for an interview.
Time went on and eventually the phone call came from my manager telling me that working from home was no longer an option - Apple wanted every single employee back in the store, zero exceptions.
I had multiple conversations with multiple managers leading up to that phone call and they all knew where I stood and what I was trying to do. I explained that after working from home for over a year, life was different. When I started working at home, Jordan was 3 and by this time she was 5. She didn’t really remember me leaving for work before the pandemic and us all being home was “the new normal”.
AND.
The ONLY NORMAL that Jordan had any recollecton of.
I explained that my numbers were better, my mental health was better, and that I didn’t think it was fair that I applied to 30+ jobs over the previous 6 months only to land 0 interviews or even get a single phone call from someone. I felt that 11 years of service and having made (literally) millions of dollars for the company should at least earn me a shot at an interview.
But.
“There’s nothing we can do” is the only answer I got because “Apple wants everyone back in the store regardless of their situation”. The phone call ended in tears and, sure, my managers were consoling and understanding and emphathetic.
BUT.
There’s one thing that I will never forget. After a long pause one of my managers said, “maybe it would be good for you to talk to someone, like a therapist, to get some help transitioning back into normal life.”
Phew.
And that?
THAT struck a nerve, friends. I remember I stopped crying and knew exactly what I needed to do - my intuitive voice (the still, small whisper inside that often guides us in moments of difficult decisions) was speaking LOUD and CLEAR …
“You don’t need a therapist to help you ‘wake up’ from the slumber of the Pandemic so that you could go back to ‘life as normal’.
No. Absolutely not.
The Pandemic was the very thing that WOKE YOU UP. You are WIDE awake and there is no way on earth that you are going to be lulled back into the slumber of being away from home for 11 or 12 hours a day just so you could have decent health benefits with mediocre pay and exhausted, bloodshot eyes.
You will NOT be going back to that life.”
Long story short …
I gave Apple my 2 week’s notice.
They told me to make it 1 week.
And I went on with my life.
I tell you this story because looking back almost 5 years later, I think what happened to me is a sad picture of much of what’s wrong with our society where …
Profit is put before people.
Work is put before family.
AND.
We’re seen as “mentally unwell” if we have a desire to see more of our family, have more time to practice our gifts and talents, and spend less time making millions of dollars for a trillion dollar company.
Apple will tell you that they put people before profit and family before work - and in many, many ways THEY DO.
I had plenty of times where I had to leave work early for a family emergency or call out of work last minute. When Dana had her miscarriage, for example, my managers took me off the schedule without any questions or pressure to return the following week.
Apple was good to me for 11 years, there’s no doubt about that. This isn’t about bashing Apple or any other company.
This issue, you see, isn’t about having good benefits or managers who are flexible with you and willing to move things around so work doesn’t get in the way of taking care of your family. Any single manager or store can be flexible with family emergencies that happen randomly here and there; and If they aren’t - it’s because they aren’t trying hard enough.
The bigger issue here is that the company (Apple and others like it) struggle to help people create a life where they can contibute to the values of the company while also feeling present at home, with ample time and energy to pour into their passions, their hobbies, and the things that breathe life into their souls.
Yes.
Because it’s one thing to help a person get through an unexpected day so they can come back to work the next day or week and be present for their job; but it’s another thing to help someone build a life where they can be present and focused on work while also being present and focused (dare I say even more so present and focused) at home and with the passions they have outside of work - the things that make them come alive.
After 11 years at Apple, that’s what I was asking for and the answer I received was “no” and if I didn’t like it to seek therapy (which they would have paid for, by the way).
And isn’t that a kicker?
Companies will very often pay for you to see a therapist to help you work through the issues that the company created in the first place.
“We’ll spend hundreds or even thousands of dollars for you to see a therapist to help you work through this issue that we created so that you can come back to work, take your place as the cog in the machine, and keep things running accordingly so that more money can be made. And if you don’t? You’re replaceable, we’ll just find someone else to do your job.”
Anyways.
I say all of this to encourage you to follow your heart. Leaving Apple was the scariest thing I ever did and the weeks that followed my exit from the store were some of the scariest we’ve ever had. I ended up going right into another job (at Starbucks) but left after only 2 shifts to find myself sitting in a house we had a mortage on, a wife, a baby, and a load of bills to pay. I was scared and spent many nights feeling like I’d never sleep again.
But, I did …
I did get some sleep.
Different opportunities did come about.
Plans appeared that we never even thought of before.
… and life evolved into what it is today where I work from home, have time for my podcast, art, and other hobbies and get to spend time with Jordan and Dana every day.
Everyone’s situation is different, of course, and everyone’s might not work out like mine did; BUT - everyone does (I believe) have the same intuitive voice inside and I firmly believe that whatever that voice is whispering for you to do …
To stay.
To leave.
To expand.
To shrink.
To go.
To stop.
To push through.
To hit the brakes.
To have the hard conversation.
To say, “YES”.
To say, “NO”.
… whaever it’s whispering, whatever it’s pushing you to do … I 100% believe that it will never (ever) steer you wrong.
Much love, my friend.
Glenn || SUPPORT / ART STUDIO