The Day Jordan and the What If Project Were Born
9 years and forever evolving
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There may be spelling / grammar mistakes in my articles that make it through my editing, and that’s on purpose. I’m a recovering perfectionist (who was once VERY hard on himself) and one of the ways I’m learning to be compassionate on myself is by allowing mistakes to just … be.
Friends.
We have entered Summer at the Siepert home - another turn of life’s seasons as Jordan finishes yet ANOTHER year of Elementary School and looks forward to going back as a 4th grader in mid-August.
Crazy.
MY kid?
FOURTH grade!
Where DOES the time go?
I was reflecting the other day, thinking about these NINE years of her life and it struck me:
The What If Project is the SAME age as Jordan.
Wild - they were born (literally) on the same day.
I remember back when she was born, I had a theological crisis in the NICU that (ultimately) led to the creation of the project. When Jordan was born she had trouble breathing and so the doctor’s cleaned her up, handed her off to the nurses, and they rushed her to the NICU with me close behind.
They got her in the tank.
They hooked her up to wires.
They sealed the tank.
They hit a bunch of buttons.
They told me to stick my hands in.
Phew.
And when I did?
My goodness.
The moment she grabbed my finger my heart exploded and my mind raced with theology that had been preached to me for over 30 years as I wondered how a God who we call a “good, good Father” could allow a place like hell to exist where some of his children …
The ones who misbehave?
The ones who believe the wrong things?
The ones who haven’t said the “Sinner’s Prayer”?
… go to be tortured for all of eternity.
As I looked at Jordan I thought to myself, “I would spend eternity using my very limited powers extinguishing the fires of such a place if even the slightest possibility existed that my child would end up there. And yet God (who is supposedly ‘all-powerful’!) allows this place to exist? Allows going there to be a punishment? If that’s true and God is a ‘good Father’ then I must be an infinitely better father. That doesn’t seem to make much sense, though; and so what if everything I’ve been taught about God is … wrong?”
Yes, what if?
Because.
I mean …me?
A better father?
Than GOD?
I didn’t know what to do with that, to be honest, and so I slipped the thought away for another day which came about 6 months later when I was sitting in the last class of my doctoral program at Alliance Theological Seminary in Nyack, NY. It was an 8-day intensive class on Evangelism (class was every day from 8-5) where we were wondering about things like …
What exactly is Evangelism?
And what is the Gospel?
And what does the Gospel have to do with modern people?
And how might we go about sharing this Gospel in modern ways?
The last assignment for the class was a 10 page paper detailing a “project” we could put together that would help share the Gospel with some sort of modern audience. Our family had already moved to North Carolina at that point and so I was staying in a hotel down the street from the school where I spent my evenings eating pizza and brainstorming ideas for the paper. I got a pack of 10 poster boards from Staples, hung them all over the room, and used different colored Sharpie markers to write out my ideas.
And finally?
After many hours?
And spending many nights up until well after Midnight?
Yes.
I landed on an idea … THE idea - the “What If Project” where I would invite people to wonder about their faith and to ask questions like, “what if there are ways of thinking about God and the Bible and faith that are different than what our traditions have handed us?”
I started to write the paper, which went well beyond 10 pages (I believe it was 25!) as my mind erupted with a freedom to ask questions and wonder about the faith of my youth - wonder if it might be bigger and grander and more beautiful than I ever imaged.
What if hell isn’t real?
What if we have misunderstood the cross?
What if Jesus didn’t “die for our sins”?
What if the Bible isn’t inerrant?
I went home and started to work on the project, which was due in December. I had another project I had been working on for about 5 years called “Morning Encouragement” (a blog/podcast/YouTube channel that had built up quite a following) and immediately put up a post and sent out an email that it was shutting down to make room for something NEW that would release the next Fall.
From there …
I secured a URL (whatifproject.net).
Created a YouTube Channel.
Secured a space to house the podcast.
Brainstormed topics.
Started writing blog posts.
… and on Palm Sunday 2018 stood out on a local street corner handing out Palm Branches and invite cards to “something new”. The invite card had a link to an old blog I had on Medium where I would announce the “What If Project” later that August.
The project started in the NICU on March 30, 2017 in the form of a question as I held my daughter’s hand for the first time and then it evolved into the podcast, blog, and more over the next year. It was announced in August of 2018 and now as we approach August of 2026, the project is still going.
Does it look different? Sure. But, don’t we all? Just as my daughter has grown and evolved over the last 9 years, so have I … and so has the What If Project.
What once explored topics that were strictly along the lines of faith and Christianity, specifically, now continues to explore those topics while also exploring topics related to art, mental health, politics, the environment, mysticism, and so much more.
Anyways.
So the other day as I was pondering the turn of life’s seasons with Jordan getting ready for the fourth grade in August, I got to thinking about the What If Project as it approaches it’s 9th birthday.
What will year 9 hold for the show?
What topics will we explore?
What new guests will we meet?
What ideas will make their way to the blog?
What sort of color will end up on the canvases?
I’m not sure, to be honest, but I know it will be fun and I know it will help me continue to evolve and grow.
You know, it’s funny. Part of me wonders when the What If Project will end. I mean, how long can it go? How long will it go? But another part of me thinks it might go on for many, many more years as it continues to grow right alongside Jordan. Both, after all, were born in the hosptial that day back in March 2017 and so it only seems fitting that they should both continue to grow and evolve right alongside of me, their dad, who is changed by both of them every single day.
Jordan teaches me something everyday - her outlook on life, her dreams, her imagination, her questions, her innocence, her wonder.
Playing outside.
Watching her at gymnastics.
Listening to her questions about God.
Her own thoughts about God!
Seeing how much she cares.
Listening to her stories about school.
Playing dolls with her.
And the What If Project teaches me something everyday, too, as I encouter new books and new ideas and new voices and new ways of being in the world.
Alexander John Shaia.
Bart Ehrman.
Elaine Pagels.
Rob Bell.
Brian McLaren.
Diana Butler Bass.
Nicole LePera.
… wow; grateful - immense gratitude.
That said, as I mentioned - Summer is here. And that means that my time is a bit more limited as I work from home and Jordan is home from school. Episodes will continue to go out on the first Monday of each month (episodes are already recorded for June, July, and August!) along with Friday Offerings and occasional blog posts.
BUT.
Things might not be as consistent as normal (which TYPICALLY gives me MUCH anxiety, but am learning is OK) as my time and attention are more directed at being present with Jordan than at getting ideas out into the world.
Anyways.
Thanks for being here, friends. I am forever grateful that I get to do this. Links to support the show and view some art are below.
Much love,
Glenn || SUPPORT / ART STUDIO